If you don’t want your entire childhood to be ruined, don’t continue reading! These dark theories on children’s movies and shows will make you wanna cry in the foetal position.
All of the Rugrats Are Dead
None of the babies actually exist, the theory suggests that they are figments of Angelica’s imagination caused by her parents’ neglect:
- Tommy was a stillborn, which explains why Stu (Tommy’s dad) was always in the basement making toys for the son he lost;
- Chuckie died with his mother, causing his father to become a nervous wreck; and
- the DeVilles had an abortion. To compensate for not knowing the gender of the baby, Angelica invented twins, one boy and one girl.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
More like Charlie and the children’s factory! Add one big spoon of crazy candy-maker, a dash of loyal Oompa Loompas, a splash of naughty brats and you have the world’s best (and most disturbing) candy.
Poor Charlie Bucket is left alive to carry on Willy Wonka’s whacked-out legacy.
Donald Duck has PTSD
Poor uncle Donald has Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, brought on by him serving as a paratrooper in WWII. As the theorist notes, he seems to have fairly regular flashbacks, difficulty responding normally to social situations, not to mention a total disinterest in talking about his wartime experiences.
Spongebob and His Bikini Bottom Buddies Are Mutations
Ok so this show is strange to begin with, but what if this quirky fellow is actually a mutant fish? The theory states that Bikini Bottom relates to Bikini Atoll (so at the bottom of Bikini), a real nuclear testing site which would have caused genetic mutations in nearby beings.
Each character represents one of the seven deadly sins:
Snow White Is a Coke Head
The story might actually be all about doing coke. According to The Conspiracy Zone, Snow White is slang for ‘blow’ and the dwarfs are said to represent the seven stages of cocaine addiction:
- Bashful and
Toy Story 3 Is Based on the Holocaust
The toys are all gathered up and taken away, they hide in an attic, they face possible death in a furnace, they are saved after finding a new homeland, sound familiar? Some theorists believe that the third and final movie is a metaphor for the Holocaust.
It gets worse…
Ever wonder where Andy’s dad is? According to Jon Negroni, Andy’s dad abandoned him, Molly and their mom and left his mom to take care of Andy and Molly by herself sniff sniff.
Winnie the Pooh Is Crazy
The teams of Dalhousie University’s Pediatrics Department published a study that diagnosed the characters in Winnie the Pooh with mental problems (no, we also don’t know why):
Based on the theory, the whole point of the story is that each character represents a different mental illness to provide children with a way to articulate their own mental illnesses.
Hundred Acre Woods also sounds like something you would call a children’s hospital…